The ill-treatment of Diwali

Diwali has come and gone by and for naive and happy people all around me, it’s this wonderful 3 days of complete fun and celebration and all I can think about is how much trouble and hard work that the children have put into those… things that people exchange valuable pieces of paper for and burn them.  And of course, who’s to say I wasn’t thinking about the extra hard work that trees do?

Whenever I mention this to any of my friends, or neighbors, who I  think are quite capable of understanding my language, they look at me with horrific expressions on their face. It’s even worse when I tell them how long it’s been since I lit a cracker (It’s seven years, in case you’re wondering. It’s been longer for my sister.)

So, okay, maybe my environmentalist side is talking too much but that’s the only rational side of me. That side of me thinks straight and tells me that whatever I’m fighting for is worth it. And I’ve NEVER, EVER felt guilty about it. Not once.

Let me come to the point. Give me one good reason why you should burn a cracker.

The people I know who burn crackers have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA about traditions. They don’t know why they get an oil bath (if they do, that is), or why they even burn crackers, or better yet, why they even celebrate Diwali. That thought makes my head throb and makes me wonder why I was even born in such a land.

There was a neighbor who was my age and lived with her aunt and the aunt’s brother (this year, she’s at a boarding college doing the *cough*) and I told her last year how much pollution it would cause. And the funny part of it is, when I tell this to anyone, they would retort by saying, “As if not burning crackers for 3 days will reduce the pollution drastically!” And then I would face-palm.

I’m now going to tell you what it is about and why you should reduce burning crackers altogether: It’s not about three days. The amount of pollution that is created in these three days is way higher than that on normal days. And I know some people will go on about how we environmentalists come out of our little shell only during festival times, especially Diwali, but the fact is, if we start reducing pollution during Diwali, we will have hope for educating the “educated class” about everyday pollution. And, in Bengaluru, it had happened in quite some places! Eco- activists marched up to people who were about to buy crackers and enlightened them on the problems. Our Problems. I was sorry I couldn’t be there.

(Oh, BTW, this was a weekly challenge called the Genre-Blender by the Daily Post and the Genre is Satire and the Style is Rant.  I thought that they went quite well together, and this is my first attempt on a known satire. Tell me what you think of it!)